My epic story I made

Well, almost every Friday night, me and a couple of friends go out of town to eat sushi.  It's like half an hour away and it's only $20 for all you can eat! We have a group and we all always go, but you see, this time, our one friend did not want to go.  He ditched us to try to get with a chick he'll never get XD.  He's been trying for a year now? And he has yet to even kiss her.  She even told us that she doesn't like him like that! Oh man, also, he is always butthurt.  He rages about everything and gets mad easily.  It is quite fun to pick on him lol
But after sushi, I sent him a text and he was pretty butthurt so I made him a story/mission:

Alright Elliot, this is what I need you to do. I have a covert mission for you, walk out the emergency exit in the movies, and do not set the alarm off. The other exits are blocked off by my agents. Walk to Boscov’s, make your way to the bathrooms in the back. There is a suitcase in the toilet bowl. Next, go to the Atlantic City airport and use the ticket attached on the side of the suitcase and fly to Germany. Upon arrival, you will be greeted by a German spy named Katherine, she will guide you to your transportation.  You will be taken to a bank where you tell the teller the secret code "he was like, and then" you will be handed a pair of keys. Have the German spy take you to the hotel, your room key is in the side pocket of the suitcase. Once inside, behind a picture frame by the TV is a safe, inside there will be instructions, keep them safe. Afterwards, make your way to the bathroom, flush the toilet, twice. Wash your hands, even though you didn't urinate. Now, open the shower curtain, and then close it. Once again, open it; there will be a bar of soap. Take the soap and put it in your pocket. Now take out the instructions and follow them precisely. Upon arrival to the destination, drop the soap and brace for impact. You will be greeted by a hamster, take the hamster and put it on your shoulder. Now, make a rainbow over your heart and try to bite the hamster. At this point of the mission, the hamster will have successful transferred its genes over to you and now you have the ability to shrink yourself and have supersonic hearing. Good, now listen close. Make your way to the nearest sewer entrance. Assemble as many twigs and leaves. Make a raft and sail down the water. Find the main stream which leads to the sewage plant. Now with the suitcase. Open it. Inside lies a
 ray gun, dispose of it. Use the toothbrush to lodge open the sealed door. If it fails, there should be a flute and that will work. Play a song and the door will open. Now close it. Play a different tune. Once the door is opened there will be a clown, take the clowns big red nose. He will then start to throw up, in his throw up there will be the next set of instructions. Dispose of the body, no, eat it. Inside the sewage plant, place c4, on the support beams, detonate it once you are outside. Unshrink and meet the German spy. Now you will be in a USMC plane. You will be flying over Libya. Jump out of the plane, and deploy your parachute. Once on ground, find the nearest telephone. You won’t be able to use yours, you will be tracked down and killed by Libyan soldiers. Call this number 856-582-6699. Quickly hang up and dial it again. Doing so, you will have detonated 3 cruise ships and 5 Boeings and 4 bullet trains. Make your way to the airport in Libya, you only have little time. Hijack a plane and fly it west towards England. Fool, you have hardly any gas and are stuck over the Atlantic Ocean. Bail. You're only option is to eject and fall into the ocean. There will be a crew waiting for you. Somalian pirates have taken over your crew and they have tied you up to a chair.  You have failed. You blew your cover from the very start when you stepped onto that plane for Germany. Now you belong to Somalian pirates and will be their bitch. You will be shown the ways of how to command the boats and live on the 7 seas. You will be named, captain.

Of course, I got the reply I knew I was gonna receive and he raged a lot!
Aww man, well thats my story, just wanted to share :]